Self confidence is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success. If you want to become self confident you need to do three things. First, become an optimist. Second, face your fears and take action. Third, surround yourself with positive people.
The internet is a great place to meet positive people. A couple of weeks ago I met Linda Salazar. She sent me an email asking for my experience with a vendor. We had a great conversation, and decided to exchange books. Linda is the author of a great book called Awaken the Genie Within: A Handbook to Help You Silence Your Gremlin, Manage Your Emotions and Bring Out the Best of Who You Are. That’s a mouthful, but the book lives up to its title.
Linda says we all have our own personal Gremlin…
“The aggressive, internal critic voice that you have been conditioned to listen to and believe for many years. This voice keeps your fears alive. It believes it is doing you a service by protecting you from making a mistake. The Gremlin is strongly invested in keeping your Genie (the gentle internal voice, of your inherent wisdom who knows your truth, champions you, and is your ally and best friend) in the bottle. I have found that naming my Gremlin gives me more power over it, and I invite you do to the same. My Gremlin’s name is Gertrude.”
Linda says that your ego is your Gremlin’s best friend because it gives you a false sense of power and self. She says that when you step outside of your ego, amazing things start to happen.
You give and receive love more easily.
Life’s roller coaster ride evens out.
You become more accepting of others and their opinions, and they of you and yours.
You take things less personally.
You actually hear what others have to say to can benefit you.
You stop creating stories around the highs and lows in life, experiencing less drama.
In other words, you become more optimistic. When you become less controlled by your ego and Gremlin, it is easier to follow the advice of The Optimist Creed:
• To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
• To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet.
• To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.
• To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimist come true.
• To think only of the best, work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
• To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
• To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
• To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature a smile.
• To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
• To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, to strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
You can’t live by these ten points if your Gremlin is in charge. You can once you let your Genie out of the bottle.
Linda Salazar suggests naming your Gremlin to give you power over it. I have named mine “Tom” -- someone who once told me that I am “pathetic.” On the other hand, I think it is a good idea to name your Genie – not to give you power over it, but to befriend it and honor its presence in your life. I have named my Genie “Stephanie”-- someone who has given me great support and advice as I change my business model.
The common sense point here is clear. Successful people are self confident. Self confident people are optimistic; they face their fears and take action; and they surround themselves with positive people – and imaginary people like their personal Genie. They tune out the negative messages that come from their personal Gremlin and tune into the positive, helpful messages that come from their personal Genie.
That’s my take on self confidence, gremlins and genies. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thanks for reading. If you want a .pdf of The Optimist Creed that you can hang in your workspace, please go to http://BudBilanich.com/optimist.
Make it a great week.