Success Common Sense

Civility and Success

Positive personal impact is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to create positive personal impact you need to do three things.  1) Develop and nurture your personal brand.  2) Be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line.  3) Know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.

Recently, I came across a great little book by P M Forni, The Civility Solution:  What to Do When People Are Rude.  Being civil is a great way to create positive personal impact.  In Chapter 2 of The Civility Solution, Mr. Forni lists his “Eight Rules for a Civil Life”…

1. Slow down and be present in your life.
2. Listen to the voice of empathy.
3. Keep a positive attitude.
4. Respect others and grant them plenty of validation.
5. Disagree graciously and refrain from arguing.
6. Get to know the people around you.
7. Pay attention to the small things.
8. Ask, don’t tell.

I think these are eight great common sense rules for conducting your life and for creating positive personal impact. 

I particularly like the first rule: slow down and be present.  We are all busy.  All too often we get so busy that we ignore the people in our lives.  Last week, we had a Spring snow storm in Denver.  We got about 12 inches in town, a lot more in the mountains.  I was writing this blog post day.  As I was writing, Cathy my wife, came into my office to tell me that the snow was falling, the wind was blowing and that we had big drifts covering the window wells on the side of our house.  I interrupted her to say something like “uh-uh.”  She responded by saying, “You didn’t even let me finish.” 

Cathy was right.  I didn’t let her finish.  I was caught up in what I was writing.  The ironic point here is that I was writing an article on civility.  I violated rule 1.  I didn’t slow down.  I wasn’t present.  Instead I kept writing and listened to my wife with only one ear.  That’s not civil. 

Rule 1 can be a difficult one for me because I often get caught up in what I’m doing.  I don’t slow down and get present.  I try to multitask, which may be somewhat efficient, but is not the way to create positive personal impact.  I’m working hard on getting better at slowing down and being present in my life.

Which of these eight rules is tough for you?  What do you do to bring yourself in line with it?

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people create positive personal impact.  People who create positive personal impact are civil; they know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.  Follow P M Forni’s eight rules for a civil life.  1) Slow down and be present in your life.  2) Listen to the voice of empathy. 3) Keep a positive attitude. 4) Respect others and grant them plenty of validation. 5) Disagree graciously and refrain from arguing. 6) Get to know the people around you. 7) Pay attention to the small things. 8) Ask, don’t tell.  These eight rules are a great guide for creating positive personal impact. 

That’s my take on civility and positive personal impact.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts on civility and what you do to live a civil life.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Self Confidence, Mentors and Success

Self confidence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become self confident, you need to do three things.  1) Become and optimist.  2) Face your fears and act.  3) Surround yourself with positive people. 

Mentors are positive people by definition.  It takes a positive person to give of himself of herself to help another learn, grow and succeed.

The term “mentor” comes from The Odyssey.  Odysseus entrusted the care of his son, Telemachus, to Mentor when he set out to fight the Trojan War.  The best mentors will help you learn and grow by sharing their knowledge and wisdom with you.  In this way, you can benefit from their experience without having to suffer the consequences of gaining that experience firsthand.  

You’re never too old to benefit from a mentoring relationship.  I am 58 years old and I am working with a mentor 20 years younger than me.  I’m working with Mike Litman because he has specialized knowledge I don’t have and I can accelerate my learning, by taking advantage of his knowledge and wisdom.

What makes for a good mentor?  A good mentor…

M  Motivates you do accomplish more than you think you can.

E  Expects the best from you.

N  Never gives up on you or lets you give up on yourself.

T  Tells you the truth – even when it hurts.

O  Occasionally kicks your butt.

R  Really cares about you and your success.

I don’t know about you, but anyone who motivates me, expects the best from me, never gives up on me or lets me give up on myself, tells me the truth, kicks my butt when I need it and really cares about me is a pretty positive person.  I want as many of those kinds of people in my life as I can get.  Mike Litman is one of those people.  That’s why I rely on him.

You can enhance your self confidence by mentoring others.  It’s never too early to become a mentor.  We all have something to give.  The sooner you begin giving the better.  If you’re in college, you can mentor high school students.  If you’re a recent graduate, you can mentor others still in school. 

Mentoring is a great way to serve others.  The more you serve others, the more confidence – and success – will come your way.  Besides that, you’ll find that you’ll grow by mentoring.  As you reflect on your life experiences and distill them into some nuggets that you can share with others your knowledge will become wisdom.

Focus on the person you are mentoring.  Its’ not about you – it’s about him or her.  Accept him or her for who he or she is.  Help him or her proceed at his or her own place.  The best mentoring relationships are guided by the person being mentored. 

Mentoring should be a positive experience for both of you.  Never treating someone you are mentoring as incompetent or incapable.  Rather, think of him or her as someone lacking in experience who needs guidance – exactly where you probably were when you were in his or her shoes.  Don’t criticize.  Help the other person think through the consequences of his or her behavior and to identify more positive ways of handling difficult or troubling situations.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people surround themselves with positive people.  Mentors, by definition, are positive people.  Find people to mentor you whenever you are engaged in a new activity.  Give back by mentoring others.  The more you surround yourself with positive people, the more self confident you will become.  By being a positive person, you will help others build their self confidence.

That’s my take on mentoring and self confidence.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Make Friends for Success

Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things.  1) Get to know yourself, use this knowledge to better understand others.  2) Build relationships with the people in your life.  3) Resolve conflict in a manner that enhances, not detracts, from your relationships.

Dan Robey is a friend.  He is also the author of a great book, The Power of Positive Habits.  I subscribe to Dan’s ezine.  On Wednesday, he sent out a killer article.  In this article, Dan really captures the essence of relationship building.  Dan is an abundance kind of guy.  He was more than happy to allow me to post his thoughts here.  Pay attention to what follows.  This is good stuff.

I have a saying that goes like this:  "There are over 6 Billion People on this planet and I can learn something new from EVERY ONE OF THE THEM."  It is a true statement, you can learn something new from everyone on the planet...but only if you put forth the effort.

I travel a lot, and I have made it a habit to try and get to know the people I come in contact with, if only for a few minutes.  Remember, these people are all perfect strangers to me.

Here are some examples.

I fly to Charlotte a lot to oversee construction of a home in the mountains. I take the same flight every time and rent a car from the same company.

When I get to the airport I check my bags with the same baggage clerks and ask them how they are doing. I look at their name tags and address them with their first name, "You guys look busy today John."  It is amazing how just mentioning their name can bring a smile.

"John, how long have you worked here...what is the funniest thing that ever happened to someone's luggage?"   You would be surprised at the incredible stories that people have about their jobs. These stories are seldom heard, you see most people are in a hurry and just want to check their bags and go.

You will hear them if you ask them to tell you their stories. Their eyes will light up as they tell them, and they will smile and so will you. Both of your days just got a little better.

I always leave a nice tip, most service people are underpaid and overworked.  When I get to Charlotte I take the same shuttle to Dollar rental car.  I hand the shuttle driver a $5 dollar bill as he helps me with my bag.  I notice that most people do not tip him at all.

I talk to the shuttle driver and find out that he is from Egypt, he works 7 days a week until he has enough money and vacation time to go back to Egypt and visit his family.  He has no days off, he has a very hard life.   Had I never taken the time to talk with him I would never have known about his life, I would have just handed him my bags and gotten on and off the bus quietly like all the other people.

But now, I know his name, and each time I see him working the shuttle bus route I always inquire as to when he will be heading back to Egypt for a visit...that makes him happy...a perfect stranger cares about his life.

When he drops me off at the rental counter I say hi to the agent of the day.  I call her by her first name because I have taken the time to learn their names and more about their lives. I ask her how she is doing.

Do you get where I am going with this?

I make it a habit to get to know perfect strangers, I always greet them with a smile and show sincere interest in "THEIR" life.  People love it when you inquire about their lives, it makes them happy.

Think about how many opportunities you have every day to make people happy, to ask strangers about their lives, their dreams. You will find that you will walk away feeling better about yourself for making them happier.

Zig Ziglar has a great saying that goes like this…"You can have everything you want in life if you will just help enough other people get what they want."

Henry Ford once said, "If there is one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view, and see things from that person's angle, as well as from your own."

That is a very powerful statement. Notice that he says this is one "secret to success." Try to make it a habit to listen to people very carefully and then put yourself in their shoes. Try to imagine how they feel, what their needs are, and then think of ways you can help them meet those needs. 

Make it a habit to greet people with a smile and show sincere interest in their lives, call them by their first names, get to know them, your life will be deeply enriched.

Oh by the way, I forgot to mention a few of the fringe benefits of this habit. I always get upgraded to the nicer rental car, I get the best service at the restaurants I go to, I am almost always met with a smile and a "Hi Dan how are you doing?"

You see, when you have friends all over the world, your friends feel good about taking care of you. This is just one of the fringe benefits you get when you are kind to complete strangers and have a sincere interest in their lives.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people are good at building relationships – not just with people who can help them, but with all of the people with whom they come into contact regularly.  Be like Dan Robey, befriend as many people as you can.  Take a few minutes to smile and engage others in conversation.  Show a genuine interest in them.  You’ll make their day, and you’ll be practicing the skills necessary to become interpersonally competent.  It’s a win-win.

That’s my take on Dan Robey’s thoughts on relationship building.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Conversation Skills for Success

Dynamic communication is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you have to master three basic skills: 1) conversation, 2) writing, and 3) presenting.

Conversation skills are really important for success.  If you are a good conversationalist, you can speak to anyone at any time.  This can be really helpful in building a solid network of contacts on whom you can rely as you move through your life and career.

People tell me that I’m a good conversationalist.  I like to hear that because I work hard at conversation.  I really listen to what other people have to say.  And, I’m lucky because I genuinely like meeting and speaking new people.  But listening well and liking people isn’t always enough.

Here are some of the tips that have helped me in my quest to become a good conversationalist.

• Be honest.  When you’re honest, you don’t have to remember what lies you told to what person.  Honesty, besides being the best policy, makes your life easier.
• Be humble.  Braggarts generally don’t fare well over the long run.  Remember the old saying “lions don’t need to roar”.
• Be courteous.  It cost you nothing, and it can mean everything to the other person.  Courtesy also helps you get what you want.  You really do get my flies with honey than vinegar.
• Look at the person with whom you’re having a conversation.  People like it when you look them in the eye.  They trust you more.
• Use a person’s name when you are in conversation.  Everybody likes to hear their own name.
• Let people finish what they are saying.  When you interrupt, you run the risk of annoying the other person; but more importantly, you run the bigger risk of missing something important that he or she has to say.
• Keep your cool.  Any fool can get upset and angry.  It takes a real lady or gentleman to handle difficult situations calmly and with aplomb.
• Be responsible for yourself.  No one can make you angry.  No matter what another person does, you can always choose to act in a civil, forthright, constructive manner. 
• Build and nurture relationships with other people.  Extend yourself.  Show some initiative, introduce yourself to people you don’t know, engage them in conversation.
• Work hard at relating to all kinds of people.  People who are different from you might make you feel uncomfortable at first.  However, they are the people from whom you are likely to learn the most.
• Listen well and demonstrate your point of view.  Ask questions if you don’t understand.  Repeat your understanding to make sure you got it right. 
• Be receptive to feedback.  Thank the other person for his or her feedback.  Use it as you see fit.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are dynamic communicators.  Outstanding communicators are great conversationalists.  If you want to become a great conversationalist, you need to develop a genuine interest in other people and what they have to say.  You need to listen well and respond in an appropriate manner.  Being honest, humble and courteous are important if you want to become known as a great conversationalist.  You can build a strong foundation for your personal and professional success by learning and practicing a few simple common sense conversation skills.

That’s my take on conversation skills and success.  What’s yours?  Who are the great conversationalists in your life?  Leave a comment telling us why they are so good.  I really appreciate all of the comments I receive.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Lifelong Learning and Success

Outstanding performance is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become an outstanding performer, you need to do three things.  1) Stay on top of your game by becoming a lifelong learner.  2) Set and achieve high goals.  3) Get organized.  Manage your time, life and stress well.

The other day I saw a great quote from Gandhi on line…

“Live as if you are to die tomorrow.  Learn as if you are to live forever.”

Both sentences are some great common sense advice for personal and professional success.  “Live as if you are to die tomorrow” is especially relevant to becoming interpersonally competent, another of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk.

“Learn as if you were to live forever” is great advice for anyone interested in becoming an outstanding performer.  The half life of knowledge is getting shorter and shorter.  If you don’t keep learning, you won’t even keep up, you’ll fall behind in the knowledge that you need to become an outstanding performer.

Thomas Carlyle once said, “What we become depends on what we read after all of the professors have finished with us. The greatest university of all is a collection of books.”  He lived in the 19th century.  If he were alive today, he might have amended his statement to say, “The internet is the greatest university of all.”  It’s true.  So many of the great books, as well as other career and life success information, are available on line.  The important thing is to keep learning – how you do it and where you get your information is secondary.

I have a huge collection of books on leadership and personal and professional success.  I also subscribe to several blogs and have bookmarked many websites that cover these subjects.  These books, blogs and websites are the first place I look when I am gathering information to post on my blog, when I am working with my executive coaching clients, when I am preparing a talk or when I am designing a training program.

As you’ve probably guessed, my best common sense suggestion for becoming a lifelong learner is simple.  Read.  Read technical journals.  Read trade magazines.  Read business publications like “The Wall Street Journal”, “Business Week”, “Fortune” and “Forbes.”  If you think they’re too stodgy, read “Fast Company.”  Read your company’s annual report.  Read your competitors’ annual reports.    Read your local newspaper and “The New York Times”.  Read news magazines like “Newsweek” and “Time.”  Read business and industry blogs.  Read books.  Reading is the best way to stay up with what’s happening in business, in your industry and in the world.
 
There are other things you can do to keep learning.  Attend seminars.  Join the major groups or trade associations for your industry.  Attend their meetings and participate.  Volunteer for committee work.  Become known locally in your field.  Take a class at your local university.  Use your company’s tuition reimbursement program to get a no or low cost free degree. 
 
I began this post with a quote from Gandhi.  I’ll end with one from Albert Einstein…

“Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.”

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are outstanding performers.  Outstanding performers stay on top of their game by becoming technically competent.  They remain technically competent by becoming lifelong learners.  In my opinion, books and the internet are the best way to keep learning; but there are many other ways to do so.  Decide which ones work for you, and then follow through.  The key is to keep learning.  As Gandhi says, “Learn as if your were going to live forever.”

That’s my take on success and lifelong learning.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, I appreciate you taking the time to read this blog.

Bud

Personal Branding, Your Value Proposition and Success

Positive personal impact is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to create positive personal impact, you need to do three things.  1) Develop and nurture your unique personal brand.  2) Be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line.  3) Know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.

I was teaching a class on personal and professional success the other day.  We spent a lot of time on personal branding.  I made the point that personal branding is pretty simple in concept.  First, figure out how you want others to think of you.  Be very clear.  Second, constantly and consistently do the things necessary to get them people to think of you in that way.  Some of the people in the class were struggling with figuring out how they want others to think of them.  It’s not as simple or easy as it first appears.

I am a member of the National Speakers Association.  There is an interesting article by Robert Bradford on marketing yourself as a speaker in the April 2009 issue of “Speaker” magazine.   He suggests that there are two important tools for speaker marketing: providing direct value and demonstrating your unique value.

If you’re struggling to determine how you want others to think of you, take a lesson from Mr. Bradford.  Ask and answer these questions? What direct value do I provide?   What is unique about the way I provide this value?

A little too abstract?  OK.  I’ll use myself as an example.  I am a success coach and motivational speaker.  I provide direct value by helping people learn the skills they need to become a personal and professional success.  I do this by using my common sense and showing others how to apply their common sense.  In this case, my direct value equals skills for personal and professional success and my unique value equals common sense. 

My Common Sense Guy brand is designed to get people to think of me as someone who can show them how to succeed (direct value) through applied common sense (unique value).

You don’t have to be in business for yourself to use this formula.  It will work for you no matter what size organization you work for.  To determine how you want the people who work with you and the people who run your company or organization to think of you, ask and answer these two questions…

• What direct value do I provide? 
• What is my unique value proposition, how am I truly different?

One you answer these two questions, you will have the beginnings of a very clear personal brand.  Once you have developed a clear brand, you’ll need to constantly and consistently act in a manner that is consistent with it.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people create positive personal impact.  A clear, well defined, unique personal brand is one of the first steps in creating positive personal impact.  You can develop your unique personal brand by asking and answering two questions.  “What direct value do I provide?”  “What is my unique value proposition, how I am truly different in providing value?”  The answers to these two questions will provide you with the basis for your personal brand.  Then it’s up to you to constantly and consistently do the things that reinforce your brand.

That’s my take on personal branding and your value proposition?  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts on these ideas?  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

March Madness, Self Confidence and Success

Self confidence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become self confident you need to do three things.  1) Become an optimist.  2) Face your fears and act.  3) Surround yourself with positive people.

It’s March Madness time in the US.  The NCAA men’s and women’s basketball tournaments are great to watch.  It’s really fun to see the enthusiasm and effort of the young men and women who are competing.

As in most years, there were some surprises in the first round of the tournament.  I enjoyed the Siena College victory over Ohio State the most.  Siena is a small liberal arts college near Albany New York.  It has a total enrollment of about 3,000.  Ohio State is one of the largest universities in the US.  It has a total enrolment of over 60,000.  I bet there are some dorms at Ohio State that have more residents than the total number of students enrolled at Siena.

None of that mattered last Friday night.  Siena beat Ohio State 74 – 72.  It took them two overtime periods to do it, but they did it.  The Saints, as Siena is called were losing by 11 points at one point in the second half.  They demonstrated the power of optimism.  They refused to quit.  They believed in themselves.  And they won a hard fought victory.

This is a great story in and of itself.  However, Ronald Moore’s story is even better.  Ronald is the Siena point guard.  As the first overtime period was winding down, he found himself with the ball and Siena trailing by 3 points.  At that point he was 0 for 4 in three point shooting in the game.  He shot and made a three point basket that sent the game into a second overtime.  Then he did it again!  With 3.9 seconds remaining in the second overtime, and Siena losing by 1, Ronald made another three point shot to win the game.

Ronald Moore made his last two three point shots attempts after missing his first four.  That takes some guts.  He hadn’t made a three point shot in over 44 minutes of play, yet with the game on the line, he made not one, but two, three pointers to win the game.  Talk about facing your fears and acting…

Ronald demonstrated the power of optimism by his willingness to take the shots he needed to win the game.  Good for him  -- and for Siena.  Their win on Friday night gave them the opportunity to play Louisville, the number 1 seed in the entire tournament on Sunday.  They played a gutty game yesterday too, and lost in the end.  They played with optimism in their heart.  They walked off the court yesterday with their heads held high.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people are optimistic and willing to face their fears and act.  The entire Siena College basketball team, demonstrated a strong sense of optimism Friday night.  They never quit – even when they were down by 11 points in the second half.  Ronald Moore shook off the failure of four straight missed three point shots to make two three point shots to tie the game and send it to a second overtime and then win it.  Take a lesson from Coach Fran McCaffery and the Siena players, the next time things get a little tough for you.  Keep your head up.  Keep playing.  Don’t be afraid to do what you need to do to win.

That’s my take on self confidence and the Siena victory over Ohio State in this year’s NCAA men’s basketball tournament.  What’s yours?  What is your favorite March Madness memory?  Please leave a comment sharing it with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

The Luck Factor and Success

Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things.  1) Get to know yourself.  Use this self knowledge to better know and understand others.  2) Build solid, long lasting, mutually beneficial relationships with the important people in your life.  3) Resolve conflict in a positive manner, one that will enhance your relationships.

I came across a great eBook last week, The Luck Factor, by Richard Wiseman.  I was struck by one of the principles on page 5: “Lucky people build and maintain a strong network of luck.”  As I read more about the network of luck concept, I realized that it has a lot to do with what I call creating positive personal impact and with relationship building.  Building a network of luck has three components: meeting a large number of people, being a social magnet and keeping in contact with people.  Take a look and see for yourself…

“Lucky people dramatically increase the possibility of a lucky chance encounter by meeting a large number of people in their daily lives.  The more people they meet, the greater opportunity they have of running into someone who could have a positive effect on their lives.

“Social magnets attract others because, without realizing it, they exhibit the types of body language and facial expressions that other people find attractive and inviting.  Lucky people exhibit exactly the same pattern of behaviors.  Upon reviewing video tapes of interviews with (self described) lucky and unlucky people, we found that lucky people smiled three times as much as unlucky people, and engage in far more eye contact.  The lucky people also tended to engage in three times as much open body language as the unlucky people.

“Lucky people are also effective at building secure and long-lasting attachments with the people they meet.  They are easy to get to know and most people like the.  They tend to be trusting and form close friendships with others.  As a result, they often keep in touch with a much larger number of friends and colleagues than unlucky people.  This network of friends helps promote opportunity in their lives.”

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people build strong relationships.  According to The Luck Factor, strong relationships help you make your own luck – and success.  It’s not difficult to make your own luck by building relationships.  Just do three things: 1) say hello to people, initiate conversation; 2) act in an inviting manner, make eye contact, display open body language and smile; and 3) stay in touch with the people you meet, turn contacts into relationships. 

That’s my take on The Luck Factor and interpersonal competence.  What’s yours?  Do you have any stories to share about how chance encounters turned into lucky relationships for you?  If so, please share them with us in a comment.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Communicate for Success

The life of a business traveler, especially one like me who travels to New York City regularly, appears glamorous at first glance. People always ask me if I’ve eaten at famous restaurants like 21 or the latest hot spot they’ve read about in Travel and Leisure. 

Most often when I’m in New York and don’t have a business dinner, I dine on Chinese food delivered to my hotel room from the Cottage Noodle Shop. I’ve never even been in this restaurant, even though I have eaten their food at least 100 times. I am particularly fond of the Cottage Noodle Shop’s Hot and Sour Soup, Vegetable Dumplings, and Lo Mein. If you’re ever in New York, check them out. They’re in the 40’s on Ninth Avenue.

Once when I ordered from the Cottage Noodle Shop, my fortune cookie read, “Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.” I was happy with this fortune, but it made me think about exactly how to get my talents recognized and rewarded.

My talents, your talents, everyone’s talents will be recognized and rewarded if we develop and use our communication skills. Dynamic communication skills are one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  There are three types of communication skills critically important for career and life success: 1) Conversation skills; 2) Writing skills; and 3) Presentation skills.  You need to develop each of these skills if you want to have your talents recognized and rewarded.

Communication skills are not just for entrepreneurs. Here’s an example of how my communication skills helped me get noticed when I was working for a very large company in the 1980s.  One day I happened to get on an elevator with the president of the largest and most profitable division in the company. I was going to be conducting a workshop at his division’s upcoming national sales meeting. I introduced myself to him and told him that I was looking forward to his sales meeting. We chatted briefly in the elevator and for a few minutes when we got to the lobby. He invited me to his office to talk some more. As a result of that conversation, I became an internal leadership consultant to him and his leadership team.

Dynamic communication skills are important for building your professional network. Networking is an important but often overlooked communication skill. It is helpful when you are looking for a job, but it is even more important when you are happy with your situation. All people who are a personal or professional success build and nurture strong networks. 

Networking is an important skill. Successful people have large networks. They have people they can call to help them. They know they can call on these people because these people know they can call on them.  That’s the real secret of networking – look to help others, not just to find out how they can help you.

Writing is another necessary tool that helps get your skills noticed. When I was in high school, I was the editor of my yearbook. To raise funds to cover the cost of our yearbook, we sold ads. There were a lot of factories in the town where I grew up. In the past, the yearbook staff had never approached these factories to place ads in the yearbook. I wrote sales letters to all of the plant managers. We got several full page ads from those letters.

One of the plant managers wrote back, asking if I would come to see him. I got dressed up in my one and only suit and went to his office at the appointed time. When I arrived, his secretary buzzed him to let him know I was there. I heard her say, “No, sir, he sent a student.” When I walked in to his office and introduced myself, he was surprised. He told me that my sales letter was so well written that he thought I was the teacher who was the yearbook sponsor.

Two years later, I was looking for a summer job after my first year of college. The market was tight. I called this man. He remembered me, and I got a job.

Presentation skills may present the biggest opportunity for getting your talents noticed. As I have always worked in training and development, I had to develop and hone my presentation skills at a young age. This wasn’t too difficult for me because I never suffered from stage fright. I used to compete in speech contests when I was in high school. I was the emcee for my high school talent show. I was on the radio in college.

Just a few months ago, I did a talk for a local chamber of commerce. As it so happens, the Sheriff’s department is a member of this chamber. The Sheriff himself happened to be there that day. He liked my talk. About a week later, I got a call from his training office. The Sheriff asked him to get in touch with me to conduct some supervisory training for their sergeants. I never would have gotten this business if it weren’t for the notice I received from a talk at that chamber meeting.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are dynamic communicators.  There are a few common sense points associated with becoming a dynamic communicator.  Become a good conversationalist by listening.  Take an active interest in other people and what they’re saying.  Show them you’re listening by asking appropriate follow up questions to what they say.  Write in a manner that communicates well.  In general, this means, being clear, concise and easily readable.  The best way to make sure your writing is readable is to read it aloud before sending it.  Finally, preparation is the most important key to doing a good presentation. 

That’s my take on communication skills and personal and professional success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Smile and Move for Success

Outstanding performance is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success.  If you want to become an outstanding performer, you need to do three things.  1) Stay on top of your game by becoming a lifelong learner.  2) Set and achieve high goals.  3) Get organized, managed your time, life and space well.

I have blogged about Smile and Move, the great little book by Sam Parker before.  I was rereading it the other day and I was struck by what Sam had to say in the introduction.

His daughter and niece were operating a lemonade stand as part of a community service project.  According to Sam, the two girls seemed to have a “less than positive and energetic approach to serving their customers.”  When he asked them why they were running their lemonade stand they said, “to get our community service hours for school, and to raise money for cancer.”

This prompted Sam to give the girls a little lecture…

“These people are stopping to be served lemonade because they might be thirsty but also so they can help you help people with cancer.  They’re your customers and they have places to go but they’re giving you their support, their time and money.  You need to approach them happily, with a smile.  And then you need to move quickly to get them their drink so they can enjoy it and move on.  You’re not doing them a favor.  They’re doing you a favor.  They don’t have to buy lemonade and they don’t have to buy it from you.  You need to smile and move, girls.”

That was the genesis of the title of his book – and some great advice for becoming an outstanding performer: smile and move.

Sam says that we smile by…

• Being awake.
• Being thankful.
• Being approachable.
• Complaining less.
• Smiling, really.

We move by…

• Starting early and going long.
• Going beyond expectations.
• Having a sense of urgency.
• Being resourceful and resilient.
• Having no excuses.

I love the smile and move philosophy.  It’s at the heart of becoming an outstanding performer and a personal and professional success.  It’s a philosophy that makes sense.  Smile – treat others with respect, enjoy what you do; move -- work a little longer, go beyond expectations and you’ll become an outstanding performer and a career and life success.

In The Slight Edge, Jeff Olson presents a simple to understand model that shows how your philosophy of life is the starting point for your personal and professional success.

Your philosophy creates your attitude.  Your attitude creates your actions.  Your actions create your results.  Your results create your success.

In other words, if you adopt the smile and move philosophy, you will create a positive attitude.  This attitude will lead you to the willingness to take the actions you need to succeed.  These actions will lead to positive results that will create a high level of performance – and personal and professional success.

Paul J Meyer says the same thing in different words…

“Whatever you can vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon must inevitably, come to pass.”

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are outstanding performers.  Outstanding performers adopt a positive mental philosophy – like smile and move.  This positive mental philosophy will help you create a driven attitude.  This driven attitude will lead you to the willingness to take the actions you need to succeed.  These actions will lead to positive results that will create a high level of performance – and personal and professional success.

That’s my take on using the smile and move philosophy as the foundation of your personal and professional success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud