Success Common Sense

Write Quickly for Success

Dynamic communication skills are one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success, 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success and Your Success GPS.  If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you need to master three basic, very important communication skills: conversation, writing and presenting.

This is a big month for me.  I have three new books coming out – all on the subject of career and life success…

• 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success
• Your Success GPS
• I Want YOU…to Succeed

I’m excited.  I feel like I’m James Patterson. If you don’t know James, he’s a fiction author who seems to put out one or two books every month.  I'm reading one of his thrillers right now. 

People often ask me how I find the time to write books when I’m busy with my coaching, consulting, speaking and blogging.  First of all, I must admit that writing comes fairly easy to me.  I was the editor of my high school newspaper and yearbook.  I was a journalism major in college.  Both experiences taught me how to write to a deadline. 

However, there is one secret that has helped me with my writing: write quickly.  Get your thoughts onto the computer screen or paper.  Worry about editing and grammar later.

I find that when I write quickly two things happen.  First, I create rough drafts easily.  Second, my writing is more conversational.  Both are good things.  Once you have a first draft, your writing project is nearly done – the editing, rewriting and proofing are just details.  And, more important, conversational writing is easier and more enjoyable to read.  You communicate better when people enjoy your writing and find it easy to read.

Yes, you have to edit and rewrite – one of my old bosses used to tell me – “rewriting is the key to good writing.”  However, if you try to edit and rewrite as you are writing, you are unlikely to get much writing done.  Editing and rewriting as you go just slows you down.  It breaks your concentration and hampers the flow of your writing.

So take a tip from a guy who writes a lot – 10 books and over 1,000 blog posts.  Write fast.  Get your thoughts out.  Then go back and edit, rewrite and proof.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are dynamic communicators.  Dynamic communicators have great conversation, writing and presentation skills.  If you want to write to communicate, use small words and short sentences.  Get your thoughts out quickly.  Don’t try to edit and rewrite as you go.  In other words, break your writing projects into two parts: 1) writing and 2) rewriting, editing and proofing.  The faster you get your thoughts out of your head and onto the computer screen or paper, the more likely your writing will communicate well to your intended audience.  Don’t get me wrong here.  You have to edit, rewrite and proof your writing.  However, it is much easier to do so after you have completed the first draft of your document, not while you’re writing it.

That’s my take on writing for success.  What’s yours?  Please take a minute to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, I really appreciate you taking the time to read what I write.  Make it a great day.

Bud

Your Success GPS

Outstanding performance is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success, 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success, and my latest book Your Success GPS.  There are three things essential for becoming an outstanding performer.  1) You have to remain technically competent.  The half life of knowledge gets shorter every day.  Become a lifelong learner to remain technically competent throughout your career.  2) You need to set and achieve high goals.  Set milestones to help you keep on track with your goals. Focus on your goals every day. Do at least one thing every day that moves you closer to accomplishing each of your goals.  3) You need to be well organized.  Manage your time, stress, workspace and lifestyle well.

Walk the Talk Company, the publisher of Your Success GPS has just informed me that the book will be available very soon.  I’m excited.  I like writing Walk the Talk handbooks.  I had a particularly good time writing Your Success GPS.  I can’t wait to hold a copy in my hands.

To pique your curiosity and whet your appetite, here’s an excerpt Your Success GPS on lifelong learning…

Technical Competence Through Lifelong Learning

You probably have spent a lot of time in college or graduate school.  You might be tempted to think that you needn’t keep learning.  After all, isn’t learning what you need to know to function in the world of work the whole point of going to school?  Not really.  You just learn the basics in school. 

Your education really begins when you start working.  Thomas Carlyle once said, “What we become depends on what we read after all of the professors have finished with us. The greatest university of all is a collection of books.”

Thomas Carlyle lived in the 19th century.  If he were alive today, he might have amended his statement to say, “The internet is the greatest university of all.”  It’s true.  So many of the great books, as well as other career and life success information, are available on line.  The important thing is to keep learning – how you do it and where you get your information is secondary.

The best thing about graduating from college is that you finally get a chance to begin learning.  I have a huge collection of books on a variety of subjects.  These books are the first place I turn when I am looking for information to post on my blog, when I am working with my executive coaching clients, when I am preparing a speech and when I am designing a training program.

The half life of knowledge is getting shorter and shorter.  If you don’t keep learning, you won’t even keep up, you’ll fall behind in the knowledge that you need to become an outstanding performer.

As you’ve probably guessed, my best common sense suggestion for becoming a lifelong learner is simple.  Read.  Read technical journals.  Read trade magazines.  Read business publications like “The Wall Street Journal”, “Business Week”, “Fortune” and “Forbes.”  If you think they’re too stodgy, read “Fast Company.”  Read your company’s annual report.  Read your competitors’ annual reports.    Read your local newspaper and “The New York Times”.  Read news magazines like “Newsweek” and “Time.”  Read business and industry blogs.  Read books.  Reading is the best way to stay up with what’s happening in business, in your industry and in the world. 

There are other things you can do to keep learning.  Attend seminars.  Join the major groups or trade associations for your industry.  Attend their meetings and participate.  Volunteer for committee work.  Become known locally in your field.  Take a class at your local university.  Use your company’s tuition reimbursement program to get a free undergraduate or graduate degree. 

Your education doesn’t stop when you graduate, it begins anew.  There are many ways to keep learning.  Decide which ones work for you, and then follow through.  Outstanding performers are technically competent.  They stay technically competent because they are lifelong learners.

As Albert Einstein said…

“Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong learning attempt to acquire it.”

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are outstanding performers.  Outstanding performers are lifelong learners.  They learn something new every day.  In today’s fast paced, highly competitive environment, if you’re not learning, you’re not standing still – you’re falling behind.  Be inquisitive.  Learn everything you can about your field, your company and your industry.  Keep learning.  In that way, you’ll become a truly valuable and indispensible person in your company – someone who flourishes in his or her job and is first in line when it comes time for promotions.

That’s my take on the importance of lifelong learning.  What’s yours?   Please take a minute to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Social Networking, Drunken Pirates and Success

Positive personal impact is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success, 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success and Your Success GPS.  If you want to create positive personal impact you need to do three things.  First, develop and nurture your unique personal brand.  Second, be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line.   Third, know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.

The Stacy Snyder story provides a good example of what not to do in all three. 

In 2006, Stacy was a student at Millersville University in Pennsylvania.  She was studying education and doing her student teaching at Conestoga Valley High School.  She also had a MySpace page on which she posted a picture of herself in a pirate costume, drinking out of a plastic cup.  The caption read “Drunken Pirate.”  Apparently she also posted a critical comment about the supervising teacher.

A parent of one the children in her student teaching class brought the photo to the attention of administrators at Conestoga Valley High School.  One thing led to another, and Millersville University refused to grant her a degree in education.  They said her photo and caption promoted underage drinking.  The university did grant her a BA in English.  However, this degree would not allow her to receive the teaching certificate required to teach in Pennsylvania.

Stacy sued the university charging that Millersville University violated her first amendment rights.  She lost. 

Writing in the WashingtonPost.com, Brian Krebs said…

“I have long urged readers to exercise caution on social networking sites, which have established themselves as fertile breeding grounds for scams and malicious software attacks. Regardless of which side was in the right in this dispute, Snyder's story is yet another reminder about the privacy impact of social networking sites: Be judicious and exercise restraint before posting details about your personal life online, because those details will in all likelihood remain online indefinitely.”

He’s right.

Now let’s consider how Stacy Snyder violated all three tenets of creating positive personal impact.

First, branding herself as a “drunken pirate” was not a good idea.  The picture, taken at a Halloween party, was not one Stacy should have posted on her MySpace page.  As the school charged, it demonstrated a lack of professionalism on her part.

Second, as Brian Krebs points out: “Be judicious and exercise restraint before posting details about your personal life online, because those details will in all likelihood remain online indefinitely.”  By posting the picture and the caption, Stacy was not presenting herself in a positive light.  Even if she won her lawsuit against Millersville University, she would have found it very difficult to find a teaching job.

Finally, Stacy violated basic rule of etiquette by posting negative comments about her supervising teacher.  Stacy should have heeded the advice most of our mothers have given us – “if you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.”

In this situation, Stacy went 0 for 3 on creating positive personal impact.  1) She branded herself as a “drunken pirate” – not a good idea when job hunting.  2) She did a poor job of presenting herself as a professional.  3) She didn’t follow the rules of etiquette when she made disparaging remarks about her supervising teacher on her website.

Also, I have seen references to Stacy’s case in print and on line for three years now.  While some of the articles have been sympathetic to her plight, most agree that she should have been more judicious in what she posted on line.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people create positive personal impact.  You create positive personal impact by building a solid, professional personal brand; presenting yourself professionally – in person and on line; and knowing and following the basic rules of etiquette.  What you post on line – on MySpace, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter or any number of places can help or hinder your attempts at creating positive personal impact.  Be smart.  Think before you hit that send button.

That’s my take on personal impact and your on line presence.  What’s yours?  Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Action, Action and More Action Builds Self Confidence and Creates Success

Self confidence is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success, 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success and Your Success GPS.  If you want to become self confident you need to do three things.  First, become an optimist.  Choose to believe that today will be better than yesterday and tomorrow will be better than today.  Second, face your fears and act.  Procrastination and inaction feed fear.  Action cures it.  Third, surround yourself with positive people.

I saw an interesting quote from Arianna Huffington the other day…

"The fastest way to break the cycle of perfectionism and become fearless is to give up the idea of doing it perfectly - indeed to embrace uncertainty and imperfection."

This is some great common sense advice.  Perfectionism will result in procrastination.  And procrastination will feed your fear. 

When you want to do something, do it.  The other day I retweeted some great common sense advice by my friend Stephanie Frank…

“If it takes less than five minutes, don’t write it down.  Just do it now.”

Action, action, action is the key to self confidence and career and life success.  Perfectionism is one of the barriers to action.  When I am coaching people on writing, I give them this advice…

“Write fast.  Get your thoughts down on the computer screen (or paper if you’re old fashioned) quickly.  Don’t worry about spelling and grammar.  Just get your thoughts out of your head.  There will be plenty of time to go back and edit.”

That’s how I write this blog – quickly.  Most of my posts are in the 500 – 600 range.  It takes me about 15 minutes to write them and another 15 to edit them.  I couldn’t do five posts a week if I spent much more time writing.

I didn’t let perfectionism stop me when I began writing this blog.  When I began blogging more than 1,000 posts ago, I didn’t have a clue about how to write a good blog.  I knew I had some things to say that many people might find helpful and interesting, so I had a friend show me how to set up and post to a blog, and I began writing.

I didn’t burden myself with perfectionist questions like, “What’s the right format?”  “How long should my posts be?”  “How do I add links?” slow me down.  I just started writing.  The rest came later as I read other blogs and saw what I liked and what I didn’t.

I took action – and here I am over 1,000 posts later.

The same is true with my books.  I write them quickly, edit them for content, and then have someone else proofread them.  Quite frankly, if I stopped to think how much work goes into writing a book, I might never have written one – let alone 10.

Paul Meyer is one of the true legends in the personal growth business.  I have his quote, “Whatever you can vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon, must inevitably come to pass,” hanging just inside the door to my office.  I read it every time I go in or out of my office.  I live my life by these words.

I saw another quote from Mr. Meyer in an email from Brian Tracy the other day…

“90% of all those who fail are not defeated.  They simply quit.”

Of these 90%, I think that some many don’t even get started.  The let perfectionism, or some other fear, get in their way.  You’ve got to play if you want to win.

I was speaking with a friend and client the other day.  The top job in his specialty for his division is coming open as the senior VP is retiring in December.  He told me that the same day he learned of the retirement, he updated his resume and sent it and a note to the head of the division asking to be considered for the soon to be vacant job.

He didn’t wait.  He didn’t say, “I’m not experienced enough.”  He didn’t spend weeks revising his resume until it was “perfect.”  He took action – and is a top candidate for the position.

One last quote from Henry Ford that popped up after I wrote the first draft of this post…

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do.”

Think about it…

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are self confident.  Self confident people take action.  They don’t let their fears, or their perfectionism trap them into procrastinating.  If you want to succeed you need to be self confident.  If you want to become self confident you need to face your fears – and any other impediment to your success – and act.  James Malinchak gives out rubber bracelets at his seminars that say “GSDF – Get Stuff Done Fast.”  Speed is often more important that perfect quality – unless you’re planning a space mission.  Build your self confidence by taking action.

That’s my take on self confidence, action and success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts on action and procrastination with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

The Tour de France, Relationships and Success

Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things.  First, get to know yourself.  Use this self knowledge to better understand others.  Second, build strong, lasting, mutually beneficial relationships with the people in your life.  Third, resolve conflict positively and with little disruption to your relationships.

It’s July, that means it’s Tour de France time.  For me, the Tour is more interesting this year, because Lance Armstrong is back in the saddle. 

I’m always amazed at the complexity of bike racing.  It’s a sport that requires amazing levels of fitness, the latest technology and high levels of teamwork.

If you’ve ever watched a bike race, you’ve seen teamwork and cooperation in action – even among competitors.  I think there is a lesson about building relationships here.

In bike racing, the person who is in the lead has to work the hardest.  He or she has to deal with all of the resistance caused by the wind.   The people behind the leader have it a bit easier as they have less wind resistance.  They stay just behind the leader and one another.  This principle is called “drafting.” 

If you watch a race, oftentimes you’ll see a lead group of several riders.  These riders will take turns moving to the front.  In this way, they help one another go faster.  They will keep this up until they are ready for the final sprint to the finish line – in which case it becomes every man or woman for himself or herself.

Yesterday, one rider, David Millar made a lone breakaway with 29 kilometers to go.  For a while, it appeared as if he was going to win the stage.  However, by working together, the peleton (the large group of riders) was able to catch him and deny him is stage win.  David won the Prix Brandt de la Combativitie prize, a testament to his warrior mentality – but he didn’t win the stage, Thor Hushovd did. 

The report I read on line said…

The end was swift and painful to watch as Millar was devoured and spat out with just under 2km to go. "To be honest I was suffering and didn't feel in control of the effort all day although I did start to feel good towards the end, although that was the adrenalin and emotion," said Millar afterwards. "What prompted the break? Stupidity, it wasn't my smartest move. I know that coast road so well from training that I thought I might have some fun. With 10km to go I thought I had a chance but then saw the huge boulevards on the run and knew the bunch would get organized. The moment you look around and see them, it's like somebody unplugs the power and you just die."

David Millar’s game effort but ultimate disappointment – he didn’t even finish in the top 10 in the stage – shows the value of cooperation and sharing the lead and the work.  This is true in relationships too.  In solid, lasting mutually beneficial relationships, all parties help one another. 

I’m a bicyclist.  I’ve just returned from a ride as I’m writing this.  I’m not a fast rider.  I’m not a slow rider.  I’m a half fast rider.  (Read the last three sentences aloud if you didn’t get the joke.)  However, I have experienced the power of teamwork even on a recreational ride.  It always helps to have someone in front, doing the hard work and shielding me from the wind.  However, I realize that I need to go to the front on occasion and do the same for my riding partners. 

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people build and maintain solid relationships with the people in their lives.  Just like in bicycle racing, cooperation, sharing the lead and the work are key to creating strong, mutually beneficial relationships.  If you get a chance, tune into the Tour de France one day this month.  You’ll see cooperation in action, even among competitors.  For quite a while now, I’ve been in the lead on this blog.  I’d like some help.  I’d appreciate it if you would go to the front of the pack and leave a thoughtful comment on – or ask a question about -- what I’ve been writing on career and life success.  That’s the way good relationships work.  I want to strengthen my relationship will all of you.

That’s my take on the bicycle racing, cooperation, sharing the lead and building strong relationships.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

How to Begin a Conversation

Dynamic communication skills are one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss inStraight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you need to master three basic, but very important, skills: conversation, writing, presenting.

Several years ago I read an eBook by Dennis Rivers, called Cooperative Communication Skills for Success at Home and at Work.  I came across the eBook in my files the other day.  Chapter 2 really caught my attention.  It is entitled “Explaining Your Conversational Intent and Inviting Consent.”  Dennis makes some common sense, but seldom seen, points about conversation skills in it.  In summary, he says, “Make sure that you tell the other person what type of conversation you want to have.  Ask him or her if he or she is ready to have this type of conversation at that time.”

Check out some of what he has to say…

In order to help your conversation partner cooperate with you and to reduce possible misunderstandings, start important conversations by inviting your conversation partner to join you in the specific kind of conversation you want to have. The more the conversation is going to mean to you, the more important it is for your conversation partner to understand the big picture. If you need to have a long, complex, or emotion-laden conversation with someone, it will make a big difference if you briefly explain your conversational intention first and then invite the consent of your intended conversation partner.

Why explain? Some conversations require a lot more time, effort and involvement than others. If you want to have a conversation that will require a significant amount of effort from
the other person, it will go better if that person understands what he or she is getting into and
consents to participate. Of course, in giving up the varying amounts of coercion and surprise
that are at work when we just launch into whatever we want to talk about, we are more
vulnerable to being turned down. But, when people agree to talk with us, they will be more
present in the conversation and more able to either meet our needs or explain why they can’t
(and perhaps suggest alternatives we had not thought of).  Many good communicators do this
explaining intent/inviting consent without giving it any thought. They start important
conversations by saying things such as: “Hi, Steve. I need to ask for your help on
my project. Got a minute to talk about it?” “Maria, do you have a minute? Right
now I’d like to talk to you about... Is that OK?” 

When we offer such combined explanations of intent and invitations-to-consent we can help
our conversations along in four important ways:

First, we give our listeners a chance to consent to or decline the offer of a specific
conversation. A person who has agreed to participate will participate more fully.

Second, we help our listeners to understand the “big picture,” the overall goal of the
conversation-to-come. Many scholars in linguistics and communication studies now
agree that understanding a person’s overall conversational intention is crucial for
understanding that person’s message in words and gestures.

Third, we allow our listeners to get ready for what is coming, especially if the topic is
emotionally charged. (If we surprise people by launching into emotional conversations, they
may respond by avoiding further conversations with us or by being permanently on guard.)

And fourth, we help our listeners understand the role that we want them to play in the
conversation: fellow problem solver, employee receiving instructions, giver of emotional
support, and so on. These are very different roles to play. Our conversations will go better if
we ask people to play only one conversational role at a time.

To be invited into a conversation is an act of respect. A consciously consenting participant is
much more likely to pay attention and cooperate than someone who feels pushed into an
undefined conversation by the force of another person’s talking.

It’s not universal, but to assume without asking that a person is available to talk may be interpreted by many people as lack of respect. When we begin a conversation by respecting the wishes of the other person, we start to generate some of the goodwill (trust that their wishes will be considered) needed for creative problem solving. I believe that the empathy we get will be more genuine and the agreements we reach will be more reliable if we give people a choice about talking with us.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are dynamic communicators.  Dynamic communicators have mastered three basic communication skills: conversation, writing and presenting.  Inviting people to participate in a conversation and getting their agreement before jumping in is an important, but often overlooked conversation skill.  People who are invited to join a conversation, and choose to do so, are more likely to be better participants.  If you want to become an excellent conversationalist, take a few minutes to explain why you want to have a conversation.  Ask the other person if he or she has the time and is willing to participate in a conversation on that topic.  Your conversations will be better and more productive if you follow this simple common sense advice.

That’s my take on how to begin important conversations.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Hard Work, Outstanding Performance and Success

Outstanding performance is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become an outstanding performer you need to do three things.  First, stay on top of your game by becoming a lifelong learner.  Second, set high goals.  Do whatever it takes to achieve them.  Third, get organized.  Manage your time, life and stress well.

And, it should go without saying, you need to work hard.  I subscribe to the Just Sell sales quotes.  Yesterday, I found this quote from Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Tipping Point, Blink and Outliers in my in box.

“The people at the very top don't work just harder or even much harder than everyone else. They work much, much harder.”

This is true – and something a lot of less than successful people really don’t want to hear. 

The law of attraction …

1. Know exactly what you want.
2. Ask the universe for it.
3. Feel, behave and know as if the object of your desire is already yours (visualize).
4. Be open to receive it and let go of (the attachment to) the outcome.

…is great as far as it goes.  However, I have found that while visualization is important in creating a successful life and career, “behave” is an overlooked word in point 3.  Hard work is the key behavior in becoming an outstanding performer and personal and professional success.

I have a quote by Paul J. Meyer hanging next to the door in my office.  I read it every time I enter or leave my office. 

“Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe, and enthusiastically act upon... must inevitably come to pass!”

I focus on the words “enthusiastically act upon.”  To my way of thinking, these three words are synonymous with hard work -- a key behavior in creating a successful life and career.  Hard work is the behavior that is often overlooked when it comes to applying the law of attraction.  If you think you can succeed merely by knowing what you want, asking the universe for it and visualizing yourself having it, I think you’re in for an unpleasant surprise. 

As Malcolm Gladwell says, successful people work much, much harder than others.

Hard work is more than long hours.  Sure, sometimes it’s necessary to work evenings and weekends.  However, it’s just as important to maximize the value of the time you spend at work.  Figure out your high brain times and do the most intense work then.  I’m best in the early morning – 6:00 till 11:00 and the late afternoon and early evening 2:30 till 7:30 or 8:00.  I do my writing and thinking then.  I use the mid day hours for exercise, errands and low brain activities.  When are your peak performance times?  If you haven’t already done so, take a few minutes to determine them and do your best to schedule your most intense work then.

Set up systems for managing your work load.  Once you have systems in place, continuously improve them.  Make them better and more efficient so you can get more work done is less time.  In this way, you’ll be maximizing the value of your hard work.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are outstanding performers.  As Malcolm Gladwell points out, outstanding performers are hard workers.  They know what they want and do whatever it takes to get it.  They enthusiastically act on their dreams.  This action helps them reach their goals.  There is no way around hard work.  You have to put in the time and effort if you want to be successful.  Ask any “overnight success.”  Everyone that I’ve ever met tells me that they spent years and years getting to the place where they became an “overnight success.”  Set your goals.  Work hard.  Work smart.  And you’ll succeed.

That’s my take on hard work and success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Authenticity, Personal Branding and Success

Positive personal impact is one of the keys to personal and professional success I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to create positive personal impact you need to do three things.  First, develop, nurture and constantly promote your unique personal brand.  Second, be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line.  Third, know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.

Mike Robbins has a new book out, Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken.  Great title -- and really true.  As you might expect, it’s all about authenticity.  Personal brands are all about authenticity.  So the advice in Mike’s book is great if you’re trying to create positive personal impact – and you should be if you want to succeed.

I like Mike’s common sense approach to authenticity.  He suggests that there are five principles for becoming authentic…

1. Know Yourself
2. Transform Your Fear
3. Express Yourself
4. Be Bold
5. Celebrate Who You Are

Here are some of Mike’s ideas on each of these principles.

You can get to know yourself by…

• Simply paying attention – to what you do and say and how you react to different stimuli.
• Learning about yourself and personality – use a commercially available personality assessment tool like the DISC, MBTI, Strengths Finder.  I am an MBTI expert.  I can help you better understand yourself by using this tool.  Send me an email if you’re interested.
• Appreciating your strengths – when I was young, words and writing came easily, math and science was difficult.  It took me a while to realize that I would do better in life if I entered a profession where I could use my natural talent with words.

Mike says you also need to…

• Have compassion for your weaknesses
• Accept yourself
• Get feedback

When it comes to fear, Mike says you need to:

• Know it
• Appreciate it
• Admit it
• Own it
• Feel it
• Express it
• Let go of it
• Take action

Great common sense advice.  I have often said that fear is the enemy of self confidence.  After reading Mike’s book, I realize it is also the enemy of authenticity and your personal brand.

Mike devotes a lot of the chapter on expressing yourself to dealing with conflict.  Conflict scares a lot of people.  It can be damaging to relationships.  I have one bit of advice on resolving conflict that I offer over and over. 

When you are in conflict with another person, work hard to find some point of agreement, however small.  Use this point of agreement to help the two of you build a creatively solution to your disagreement.

This is a great way to express yourself positively in a conflict situation.

Mike uses the Dictionary.com definition for the word “bold.”

“Not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring.”

He suggests five keys to being bold in life…

1. Be true to yourself.
2. Live with passion.
3. Step out.
4. Lean on others.
5. Get up when you fall down.

When it comes to celebrating who you are, Mike offers the following advice…

• Make peace with yourself, you’re OK just as you are.
• Forgive yourself – and others.
• Appreciate yourself.
• Honor yourself.
• Own your personal greatness.
• Love yourself

I’ve just covered an entire book in about 570 words.  I haven’t done justice to Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken.  I hope, however, that I have piqued your curiosity.  If you’re interested in developing a unique personal brand, you need to read this book.  Trust me, it’s that powerful and well written.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people stand out by creating positive personal impact.  You can begin to create positive personal impact by developing, nurturing and constantly living your unique personal brand.  While your personal brand should be uniquely you, it should be based on authenticity and integrity.  Mike Robbins’ great book, Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken is a treasure trove of advice on authenticity.  You can’t go wrong with Mike’s common sense advice.  Pick it up, read it and more important, use the valuable advice inside.

That’s my take on authenticity and personal branding.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading. 

Bud

Ron Mallett, Optimism and Success

Self confidence is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become self confident you need to do three things.  First, become an optimist.  Believe that today will be better than tomorrow, and tomorrow better than today.  Do everything you can to make your optimism come true.   Second, face your fears and act.  Procrastination and indecision feed fear.  Action cures it.  Third, surround yourself with positive people.

The most recent Penn State Alumni had an article that featured the life of one of the most optimistic people I have encountered.  Dr. Ron Mallet is a tenured professor in the Physics Department at the University of Connecticut.  He received a BS, MS and PhD from Penn State, my alma mater.    Dr. Mallet has been featured on the NPR show, “This American Life.” Rolling Stone listed his research as the hot theory of 2001.  He’s written a bestselling memoir.  Spike Lee is making a movie about his life.

You’re probably asking, “What theory did Dr. Mallet develop?”  Good question.  Dr. Ron Mallet has mathematically proven that it is possible to travel through time.

Ron Mallet’s father died in 1955 at the age of 33.  He had a massive heart attack.  Ron was 10 years old and devastated.  One year later, he came across the Classics Illustrated version of H.G. Well’s famous novel, The Time Machine.  (I loved Classics Illustrated comics when I was a kid.  They were my introduction to many literary classics.  If I liked the comic book version, I used to go to the Laughlin Memorial Library in my hometown, Ambridge PA, and get the real book.) 

The words on the first page of the Classics Illustrated version of The Time Machine said, “Scientific people know very well that time is only a kind of space.  We can move forward and backward in time just like we can move forward and backward in space.”

11 year old Ron was jazzed.  He figured that if he could build a time machine, he could go back in time, visit with his father and warn him about his heart attack.  He began work on building a time machine – a quest that became his life’s work.

A year later, he came across a book called The Universe and Dr. Einstein.  He was 12 and couldn’t understand a lot of what was in the book, but he did understand one passage.  Einstein had found that time slows down the faster one moves.  The article in the Penn Stater says…

“That meant time could be controlled.  Suddenly, Mallet’s dream wasn’t just based on the cover of a comic book.  There was a possible answer in science, real science, conducted by one of the most respected scientists ever.  ‘I knew that if I could understand Einstein,’ he said, ‘that would be the key.’”

He didn’t have money to go to college when he graduated from high school, so he joined the Air Force.  In his spare time, he did very little but read.  He book used books to learn about binary codes, quantum physics, electrodynamics and relativity theory.  He signed up for correspondence courses is algebra, geometry and solid-state devices. 

He enrolled at Penn State on the GI Bill after he finished his tour of duty in the Air Force.  He studied theoretical physics – hoping to be able to build a time machine.

“That was part of my cover story.  I didn’t have to tell people that I wanted to build a time machine.  I could actually say, ‘I want to be a theoretical physicist.’  It was a perfectly acceptable statement.”  He went on to get his PhD and join the faculty of the University of Connecticut.  He never gave up on his dream of building a time machine.

In 1999, he connected some dots – these dots are a little complicated for a layman like me, but essentially he concluded…

Sir Isaac Newton thought that only matter could create a gravitational field.  But, in Einstein’s general theory, light could also affect gravity.  If light could affect gravity, and gravity can affect time then maybe light could alter time.

Got that?  Read on.

From this point, he spent weeks on calculations eventually proving mathematically that time travel is possible.  It only took him 43 years.

In 2001, he presented a paper at the University of Michigan entitled: “The Gravity of Circulating Light: A Possible Route to Time Travel.”

That got him on NPR and mentioned in Rolling Stone and a call from Spike Lee (one of my favorite directors) that led to the movie about his life that will be out in 2011.

Back at UConn, one of Dr. Mallett’s colleagues is developing a machine based on his calculations.  This machine is being designed to transport subatomic particles through time.  Ron Mallet’s dream of time travel might just become a reality.

I tell you this story because Dr. Ron Mallett is the embodiment of optimism.  He has spent his entire life in the pursuit of something that most people would think is absurd.  Through it all he epitomized the third point of The Optimist Creed – “promise yourself to look at the sunny side of everything and your optimism come true.” 

By the way, if you want a copy of The Optimist Creed that you can frame and hang in your workspace, just like me, go to http://BudBilanich.com/optimist.

The common sense point here is clear.  Successful people are self confident.  Optimism is the foundation of self confidence.  If you want to become self confident, you have to choose optimism.  Dr. Ron Mallett did, and he proved that time travel is a theoretical possibility.  What can you accomplish if you choose optimism?  Think about it.  Then go for it.

That’s my take on Dr. Ron Mallett, optimism and success.  What’s yours?  Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  If you’re interested in getting the full story on Ron Mallett, pick up a copy of his book, Time Traveler: A Scientist’s Personal Mission to Make Time Travel a Reality.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud

Successful People Build Strong Relationships With Their Colleagues

Tomorrow is Independence Day in the USA.  Happy 4th of July to all of my readers in the US.  I hope you get a chance to relax and enjoy the long weekend.  Cathy and I are headed for the beautiful Colorado mountains for some rest and relaxation.  But for now, on to today’s thoughts about personal and professional success…

Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to career and life success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success and 42 Rules to Jumpstart Your Professional Success.  If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things.  First, get to know yourself.  Use this self knowledge to better understand and influence others.  Second, build solid, lasting, mutually beneficial relationships with the important people in your life.  Third, resolve conflict positively and creatively, with minimal disruption to your relationships.

Yesterday, I shared a story about one of my coaching clients.  Here’s another one…

James was with his company for close to 30 years and was a very senior executive. He had risen through the ranks and was well regarded by almost everyone who knew him. A couple of years ago, he was asked to resign. 

James became the protégé of a senior manager early in his career.  As the manager moved up, James moved up with him. The manager had great faith in James’ business acumen and his problem solving ability. Whenever a problem arose, James’ manager would ask him to “look into it and fix it.”

James enjoyed these challenges. He was smart, and had an uncanny ability to zero in on what was going wrong. He was equally adept at coming up with solutions to problems.

James had a problem though. Most of the time, the problems he was asked to fix were not in his area of responsibility. They were problems that his peers, other people at his level, who reported to his boss, were experiencing. In pleasing his boss and solving problems, James stepped all over the toes of his peers. They came to resent him for it.

One day, his boss left the company. One of James’ peers was appointed to take his place.  Three months later, James was asked to resign. He was asked to resign not because of his performance. In some ways, it was because he was too competent. He was asked to resign because he hadn’t built strong relationships with his peers. Often, by doing what his boss wanted, he alienated the people closest to him. 

James and I began working together on his interpersonal skills.  James came to understand that it was important not only to do a great job and to fix problems, but to do so in a way that did not alienate those around him.

I’m happy to say that James landed a job as President of a small company in his industry.  We still speak.  He tells me that the secret to his newfound success is not only his willingness to work hard but to build and maintain relationships with people at all levels of his company.

James story illustrates an important point about success.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  They realize that relationships are the key to success.  No one can go it alone and succeed.

The common sense point here is simple.  Successful people are interpersonally competent.  Interpersonally competent people build and maintain strong relationships with the people close to them.  They also resolve conflict in a manner that enhances, not detracts, from these relationships.  If you want to become interpersonally competent put as much effort into building strong relationships with your colleagues as you do in producing good results.  Remember, success depends both on what you do and how you do it. 

That’s my take on the importance of relationships to your success.  What do you think?  Please take a minute to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us.  As always, thanks for reading.

Bud